i'm just.....

assalamualaikum..

*with low tones not like usual. usually i use the the very excited one.*

hey guys... noo... im not sleepy or sick. of course not.
but.....
i'm really tired of this game.
seriously t.i.r.ed.
e.x.h.a.u.s.t.e.d,
no matter how strong i am to say "lorh? never mind.. im ok".. "im fine" "i don care" . "im sad? of coz not" . i'm cool". " i don have any problem" and what so ever.
even my lips keep on smiling... laughing..
but deeeeeeeeeep inside my heart.
i wanna say something. just SAY. not shout or 'memberontak' ka apa...
i never let my heart 'bersuara'. u know bersuara? hahaha. ok2 jgn gelak.
i just wanna say. "just. stop it. pleaseeeeeee"
im tired to be in this game. people please. stop it.

kadang2 rasa nak pergi jaohhhhh.. jaoh dari suma orang...
just let me be happy with the one who loves me (among family n fren)  and Him.
but i have no choice.
i have to face it.
tolong laa im not asking anyone to understand me. NOT EVEN ONCE. seriously not. up to you either u want to comfort me or not. i'm just fine... as long as u're being sincere to me. i don need a liar. really don need. awak nak kutuk saya, sy tak marah.. awk ada pndapat awk sendiri. asalkan awk tak puji sy depan sy. belakang saya awak kutuk.. u're not a coward rite?


but i want u to understand.. hidup nii sementara saja. S.E.M.E.N.T.A.R.A.. kalo awak rasa hidup sementara nii laa nak enjoy puas2, nak maen puas2.. awak buat dulu yer... buat lah apa yg awak suka. sy tak halang. lg halang, lg nak buat kan?


the reason why i just can keep on smiling .... sbb sy tahu, apa pown yg mereka lakukan, pasti ada balasan setimpal dr Allah.. mereka mungkin terlepas kt dunia, tapi bukan di akhirat..  sy yakin tuu !  jd awak2 yg kt luar sana tuuu, yg terluka, marah, bebal suma tuu.. don wory ok? smile jaaa.... Allah sentiasa berada dgn org2 yg sabar... =)

so, at this moment, realizing that anything can happen within a second.... saya, nur aqilah khadijah rosili nak mintak maaf banyak2 kat kawan2 baek saya.. adlin, eikha,  fify, hanis, masitah, noni... (susunan mngikut abjad yer) andai ada kata2, perbuatan , atau apa2 kesalahan yg dlakukan,yg dh mengguris hati dan prasan, iklas mintak maaf dari hujung rambut sampai hujung kaki... mesti pernah ada buat salah kan spnjang prsahabatan rapat kita... mesti ada, insyaAllah... bnda yg sama takkan berulang.. lagi satu, halalkan suma.. tp kalo ada hutang mana2 tuu cakap laa.. hehehehe... semoga persahabatan ini diberkati Allah SWT.  sahabat yg baek, dibawa ke syurga... aminn.. 


-missa-